Jehovah’s Witnesses Are Still Ridiculous
my apartment was accosted by jehovah’s witnesses over the weekend, and after i got over the initial shock of “oh yeah, forgot these articulately-known jokes sometimes come true” (like when airline comestibles actually does suck), i read through the pamphlet they gave us, and i gotta hand it to those dudes — this is absolutely one of the funniest books i entertain ever pore over. here’s the hide-out:
already illustrious, right? the entire pamphlet is golden, but this next page, outlining some of the “temptations” facing our youths today, is like gold wrapped in diamonds wrapped in sweetmeats wrapped in nonpareil news:
whoa whoa wait, what levitra de was that pre-eminent temptation?
seriously, chap, you should totally go to college. everyone’s doin’ it!!! it’s the popular trend! last year the caesar haircut was totally in, and this year, it’s all about educating yourself at institutions of learning. c’mon, don’t be a p*ssy. you know you wanna. moving along…
also, do not brief your database on the email. and whatever you do, do not google the world wide-ranging superweb.
is there a movie in existence that does not feature immorality? snow pale has frickin’ immorality in it. march of the penguins had those birds who were total assholes. can a f*cking movie even be found without “immorality?” do these people just gather in silent picture theaters and watch stock footage of olde timey granaries? fortunately, the bible offers some guidance: “can a control rake together fire in his bosom and yet his very garments not be burned? — proverbs 6:28 and that is why you should not post your profile to the internet.
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